By Eamon Scarbrough
There have been a lot of developments in the government lately, most significant being the temporary shutdown that came as an effect of our leaders not being able to make a decision about healthcare.
This article, however, isn’t about the circumstances of our country’s situation. Instead, it is about the connotations of a “government shutdown.”
When I heard that the government was shut down, I thought, “Now’s my chance to bungee jump from the roof of Bernalillo Hall!” My mind was awash with possibilities.
With a sufficiently threatening weapon, I could go into any fast food joint and get a nice meal, free of charge. Heck, why stop there? My family hasn’t had a nice dinner in a while, and with Cattle Baron unprotected, it shouldn’t be much more difficult to force some steaks out of them.
Of course, I’m aware that the owners of these businesses would have the right to protect themselves and their establishments, but that would open up a whole new opportunity: impromptu action sequences, a la Die Hard or Escape from New York.
I would be hard pressed to find someone who hasn’t ever wanted to participate in a high-speed chase or get in a commando-style shootout with a group of nondescript thugs.
The government shutdown, if it really lived up to its namesake, not only would be a perfect outlet for ordinary citizens to vent their daily frustrations, but it also would be a great source of entertainment.
Television networks could capitalize on the chaos and have two contestants fight it out to the death—for a cash prize of course.
Endangered species could be hunted, turning the grandest dreams of crazed hunters into reality.
All of the fanatics of post-apocalyptic fiction finally could dawn their leather and chains, get in their dune buggies, and battle it out for gasoline in the government-free wasteland that America ideally would become.
Of course, when the government shutdown finally ended—when politicians decided to end their hopscotch tournament (or whatever they’re doing in Washington, D.C.)—there would be a fairly large mess to clean up.
Perhaps, just perhaps, a post-apocalyptic wasteland free from the rule of law and the iron hand of the government would be preferable to the system we’re living in now.
A majority of the population likely would be cut down, helping with that hunger problem we’re facing.
Plus, the prison system is overdue for a good flushing. If the inmates were freed and started a riot that evolved into a violent massacre that ended with a final showdown with the last remnants of the U.S. Army, would we be any better or worse for it? Who knows?
A society that didn’t have the government to protect it would be total chaos, but it would certainly be an alternative to being part of a system that puts you in its file and eventually discards you.